Dear Dr Heartache....I'm destroyed...

Dear Dr Heartache. please....when you read my story of such pain, horror and suffering, please try not to break down in sobs and tears.

Try to remain composed so you can advise me.

Muhammed and I were married two weeks ago and were delirious with joy and happiness. Muhammed and I bought a beautiful home in the San Fernando valley. We planned on having four kids.

Everything was going fine until one day when Muhammed and I decided to go shopping for carpet.

We had hardwood floors and I want carpet.

On the way to the carpet store we stopped at Burger King for whoppers and two cokes.

We finished our burgers and fires and cokes, then decided to stop at this beautiful park to walk through it holding hands.

We were in total and absolute bliss. We talked of the future and laughed together.

We finally got to the carpet place and started looking around. The sales person was very helpful as we explained exactly what we were after.

Then for no apparent reason Muhammed sat on this carpet...

and said some Arabic words and flew away.

Oh Dr Heartache.....I'm devastated beyond description!

The last word I heard Muhammed shout as

he flew away on his magic carpet was..............

Happy Ramadan to all and to all a goodnight!

What shall I do? I'm lost and so heartbroken.....he left on a carpet I would never choose for our house.

Shall I wait for Muhammed to fly back?

Shall I forget him?

Please help me....I'm so lost!

Now I understand why he got that gleam in his eye

when I said the word "rug"

Completely shattered in southern California

Dear Completely shattered in southern California,

Please wait until I reach for another

box of tissues to dry my tear soaked eyes.

First you must leave for Mecca immediately!

When you get there, rent a camel and go out to the desert to find this low down husband who abandoned you.

If you don't find him in Mecca go to Medina.

When you find the flying ace, tell him that if he is sorry you will

forgive and forget

but if he refuses you must accept the fact that he is not the one for you.

Then go home and place an ad in the

Torrid Midnight Passion Dating Services.

Hope this helped...

Dr Heartache....I'm slowly dying......

Dear Dr Heartache.....I Need Help....fast...

Please help me Dr Heartache,

My life is utterly and completely destroyed. I...I....I...I...cried all night long and didn't stop until a few minutes ago.

I just found out that my boss Chang is firing me this Friday.

He didn't tell me but apparently he has been telling the whole company.

What kind of a low down employer would stoop to such behaviour? He and I dated for a while, then I found out that he was already engaged to a wildly insane Buddhist. She lives in a temple outside of the city and is a vegetarian. She dresses like the Dali Llama.

It is reported that they plan to marry in front of the Dali Llama so he can smile at them.

Have you ever heard such nonsense?

He said that he would break it off with Little Flower bell if I agreed to marry him also in front of the Dali Llama and live the rest of my life in a temple.

Is he insane? I'm a Christian and so sorry that I dated a pagan heathen heretic who lives to eat tofu and commit idolatry.

Dr Heartache, I can't do that.....I see the Dali Llama as a severely misled individual. I know I'm supposed to respect other's beliefs but I'm quite confused with his nonsense and utter betrayals and lies and low down ways...my boss, not the Dali Llama.Is this love or is it simply infatuation?

What shall I do?

Hate the Buddhists who have betrayed me in Arkansas

Dear Hate the Buddhists who betrayed me in Arkansas,

You dated a Buddhist? Love?

Infatuation?

Let's not even go there, ok?

One who was engaged to a wildly insane other Buddhist?

Sounds like you need therapy of a special kind.

Since this is Monday Chang must have already fired you.

I strongly urge you to seek help from your pastor.

Another thing.......who said you must respect other's beliefs?

I suggest you also forgive and move on.

Stay away from Chang......he sounds like a real piece of work.

Oh.....and get a life!

Hope this helped.....

Dr Heartache why so many atheists today?

Dear Dr Heartache,

My question has nothing to do with love and loss as I see so many are, but I wonder why there are so many atheists today? Do you have any idea why there are?

I read that more and more people are not believing in God anymore. I can't see how you can believe in him, then stop. Atheism is working hard to "save" the planet from what they perceive as destructive beliefs.

I surf the web and find many many sites dedicated to atheism. I find many sites dedicated to getting the Word out.

Sadly, not one of the people who are trying to get the Word out agree with the other people who are trying to get the Word out. Atheists seem to agree with each other, in that they all say there is no God. And they all agree that people who do believe in God believe in fairy tales.

Now atheism says one thing.....there is no God, or if you happen to be a dyslexic atheist you say.....there is no dog.

Anyway Dr Heartache, I don't know if you're a Christian or not, but can you help me with this?

While I'm waiting for your answer, I'll go down to Fisherman's Wharf for junk food.

Wondering in San Francisco, California

Dear Wondering in San Francisco, California,

The atheists can thank the Christians for helping them recruit more atheists.

They should build a website in honor of the fundies who are causing more and more people to not believe in God.

Who wants to believe in a God who makes greedy rich people richer while millions go hungry and die alone in poverty and squalor? Do you?

Who wants to believe in a God who blesses self-absorbed people and ignores the needy?

This is the God the Christians present and the atheists are successfully using it to promote their agenda.

The fundies make the atheists work very easy.

The Christian television programs never preach of a Saviour who suffered in agony and shame on an old rugged cross and

died for their sins, who commands you to repent of your sins,

and turn from your wicked ways.

But they preach a gospel that tells you how wonderful you are. The Lord said we are sinners in need of a Saviour, this is the message not being preached.

They promote a social gospel that promotes YOU, promises YOU riches if YOU plant seeds of money.

The gospel requires self-denial. Jesus said to take up your cross and follow him.

The Lord said if you save your life, you will lose it, but if you lose your life you will save it.

The Lord is being blamed for what many professing Christians do.

Don't allow what others do to influence you in any way, but take up your cross

and follow the humble Saviour who promised you strength for your day, rest for the journey and light and grace to help you along your way.

"And he said to them all, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow me." Luke 9:23